What did the Easter egg say to the boiling water? "It's gonna take a while to get me hard. I just got laid by some chick."

Credit goes to Andres for texting me that joke.

Mommy asked me to wear these new True Religion jeans and Armani shirt she got me for church. The jeans are tight. I have to unbutton whenever I'm sitting down.

We ate at Thai BBQ and brought sweet & sour pork, kung pao beef and egg plant from Panda Inn to Uncle Lando's for potluck. Cousin Janine had a fever.

Highlight of the day: Mommy's sister (Auntie Bella), the bully, couldn't make it.

Cute moment of the day: Janine and Jillian's dog, Brownie, was playing with Kristian and Kathy's new dog in the empty/drained swimming pool. Brownie was hyperactive enough to run back and forth from both ends of the pool. But the new dog was too fat to run up the slope. Eventually, the much smaller Brownie tried running up behind him, pushing his head into his ass to go up the slope.