Who's Birthday is it? America's!

There's this raver chick named Allison from Palmdale. She's on my Myspace. I have her listed in my phone as "Allison from Palmdale." It's a reference to the Terminator: the Sarah Connor Chronicles episode of the same name that revealed that the Terminator, Cameron, was based on a human named Allison Young from Palmdale. Additionally, the Allison I know in real life shoots guns. Anyway, she sent me a text message greeting me a Happy 4th of July. Wow, I felt all tingly, like masturbation status. Oh, sure, it was a mass-text sent to everyone. But I only care that I received it.

Tiwat picked me up yesterday to go to Heather's 32nd Birthday party at her house in Anaheim Hills. On the way there, we stopped by Ralph's to pick up my present for Heather and I found a small magazine that featured an interview with Kelly Clarkson. But that deserves its own post.

I wrote in marker:

4th of July, 2009

Dearest Heather,

Happy Getting Older.

Love,

Ryan :-)

Roxy was there. She and Gavin just got married. Gavin was absent, though. He had to work. But some slut with a toddler daughter was there trying to give Roxy advice about being the superior one in the marriage under the guise of pregnancy advice. Some shit about how she will always be her daughter's mother more than her father will ever be her father. Her reasoning being that she's the one who "sacrificed her body," which she revealed meant "got fat," blah, blah, blah; whine, whine, whine; bitch, bitch, bitch ... I was thinking that that's a gateway for egocentrism that would destroy a relationship. Guess what? She later said she got divorced. Go figure. (Oh, of course she said that she filed for divorce, typical for the bitch to say, but it's usually the guy that dumps the chick for that type of immaturity.)

Chris: You will forget all this in 2 years.

[the bitch then flips him off]

Heather: (Sarcastically) Hmm ... what a surprise. You called me yesterday asking what my favorite beer is. And here it is.

Ryan: Yeah, what a coincidence!

This is what I call our "EDC make-up picture" because we couldn't find each other during EDC last weekend. Oh, and Mark and I talked about how Allison from Palmdale uses a water bra.

Kat: Did I ever tell you my family lives 3 houses from Kelly Clarkson's family in Texas?

Ryan: I tell all my friends that I have a best friend whose family lives 3 houses from Kelly Clarkson's family in Texas.

Whether Kat likes it or not, she is my BFF for the above reason. For example, she was trying to defend the banana cream pie that she got for Heather from everyone's hands and I reminded her, "Hey, we have a bond!" She reluctantly agreed, "Yes, we do." And I got my slice of pie.

Heather: Hey! Who's Birthday is it?

Everyone: (sarcastically) America's.

I came home and was still wasted at 4AM. I extracted Edlin, bartender Lisa, and Allison from Palmdale from my database while in the shower before going to sleep.

I overslept. I saw cousin Andree today before she went back to Vegas. I had to go to church with mom at Our Lady of Lourdes. And then dinner at T.G.I.Friday's.