Secretive and mysterious

I took the day off from the gym for recovery.

I went to sign up for the Commercial Acting class, but it was cancelled due to insufficient enrollment. Boo.

I got my free replacement for my Macbook's battery charger.

While taking the high ground to scout for Eugene, Stef, and Jun below, I saw Justin from Primerica. He was on his way to a secret networking meeting in the Americana, but was awaiting directions on the exact location. I was technically at a secret meeting as I was supposed to meet the group at Sanrio, but it went out of business, so I had to remember the former location - an empty store for lease. It's fun being secretive and mysterious.

My laptop's battery charger melted

I finally gave my hot beef injection a rest after busting a #3 for 4 days straight. Don't remember the last time I accomplished that feat.

I did my 5th day of upper body pull muscles.

Since last fall, the battery charger for my Macbook has gradually been melting whenever charging. Today, it finally stopped charging as the wires were literally fried.

I went to the Apple store and was greeted by William who now works there. Who's William? He used to work with Brian and Iam at the GNC. People suspected him of being gay until he spoke up for himself. Apparently, he just had ironically feminine traits. He quit two years ago to concentrate more at CSUN. Anyway, they gave me an appointment to show up tomorrow at 4:00PM where they would be able to give me a new battery charger for free because it's considered a defect.

I was going to do an extra day at the gym, but actually ran out of energy. There was the longest line at the movie theater in the Americana for Eclipse: the Twilight Saga.

I'm a "hot, sexy beast"

Guro had to reschedule Filipino Martial Arts (FMA) training again. Gosh I'd be so rich by now if I got money for every time he did that.

I went to the gym to do day 5 of my current upper body push muscles. There's a new chick working at the front desk. Her name tag says: Alle. She's pale with dark, wavy hair. I can't tell if Alle is white, or possibly Latina or even armo. But she's in my database.

I busted a #3 to that long-legged chick in the gym from last night.

I watched last night's episode of True Blood, which I can only watch when my mommy's not home. Holy crap, it ended with the main vampire hero being forced against his will to bang the female vampire villain, so the vampire dude angrily twists her neck in a 180 while doing the in-out in-out with her!

I went to Capoeira class, but surprisingly, it was a berimbau-making workshop. Aside from Andres, only Marko and Carlito showed up. It took me the whole session to cut my gord in half with a saw to make it into a gunga. At least I got to sand the inside of it.

Then I drove through the 210 to the 118 to get to Paul and Martha's house to upload their performance. I walked in on Martha watching Remember Me, the movie where Robert Pattinson gets killed off by 9/11.

RYAN: Have you seen this before?
MARTHA: No.
RYAN: You're gonna hate the ending.

Martha smacked me. And when Edward Cullen died in the twin towers, her flipping out was priceless. Then Paul made fun of her for wanting to bang Pattinson and how she's a cougar and blah, blah, blah.

MARTHA: Well, didn't I tell you I thought Ryan was a hot, sexy beast? [She yanks my ponytail hard]

Burritos for dinner. Yummy.

RYAN: Can I have a cookie?
MARTHA: Only if you eat it with milk.

And I added a brownie bite with it.

RYAN: All right, I'm off to the gym.
MARTHA: Are you insane? At this hour? Blah, blah, blah ...

Crap, she's starting to sound like my mom, which only makes it weird that she thought I was a "hot, sexy beast."

MARTHA: Go home!
RYAN: Ok, I'll go home ... to change. Then I'll go to the gym.
MARTHA: I'm gonna kick you! Remind me next time to kick you!

I did half an hour of cardio at the gym, 5 sets of pec flies, and day 3 of abs.

Ever heard of anger sex? Well, I just invented anger masturbation.

I went to church. Father Paul, who had been a priest there for 10 years, served his last mass with us as he's being transferred.

My mommy and I tried to go to Minx for lunch, but they were closing early. The chick at the front desk was a blond chick with possibly an Australian accent. Ever heard of anger sex? Well, I just invented anger masturbation. I took out my frustration of not being able to eat at Minx by busting a #3 to that Aussie chick.

The only cool thing today was eating dinner at Zono Sushi whee they finally had toro (fatty tuna). They haven't had it for the past year whenever I was there.

Went to the gym to do day 5 for my current legs regiment and day 2 of abs. There was a white chick there with dirty blond hair and long legs, yet still shorter than me like cute chicks should be. Now she is so in my database.

Whatever, boyfriend. Your florist girlfriend is in my database.

I rocked at guitar practice. Eugene picked me up. We, along with Stef, went to Palmdale to watch Kate in a production of Les Miserables.

First, we bought flowers for Kate. The florist was a bottle blond who missed a few spots. She mentioned her boyfriend was bartending at EDC last night and made $3,000 in tips. Whatever, boyfriend. Your florist girlfriend is in my database.

At a sushi place down the street, the sushi maker (who interestingly wasn't Asian) was playing electronic music. The topic of EDC came up and it turns out that he sped down there by himself the night before as soon as he got off work.

SUSHI MAKER: Yeah, I received pics on my phone. My girlfriend looked all hagard, everyone was fucked up, by the time I got there I was the only sober one and everyone was talking all fast ...

War of the Worlds was playing on their TV.

EUGENE: (Referring to Dakota Fanning) She is so not a little girl.

STEF: (At me) Are you one of those guys who waits for cute girls to turn 18?
RYAN: You didn't know?
EUGENE: I never told her.

Anyway, tuna and salmon sushi, sake, and Eugene's Sapporo beer that he couldn't finish = I felt great!

SUSHI MAKER: I'm Isaac. What's your name?

I now know another raver in Palmdale. The only other one is that chick Allison, whom Mark knows I bust a #3 to. When Mark texted me, I said I was in Palmdale and could bust a #3 alone to that hometown connection with Allison. Anyway, Isaac mentioned some club or event called Musica in the Palmdale area.

I didn't have any expectations, but Eugene and Stef were so apalled by the lack of quality of their Les Miserables that we left during intermission. But I do want to bust a #3 to the chick who sang I Dreamed a Dream. Oh, and Brandon texted me:

Hi. I don't want to kill your buzz. But [Fedor Emeliamenko] lost by triangle [choke]. Roll for me will you? Dance and rill for mee

I forgot to tell him I was forced to skip EDC. At my house, I showed Eugene and Stef the movie The Foot Fist Way. They laughed and cried (tears of laughter). Then I went to the gym for cardio. Then I randomly busted a #3 to my old friend Rebekah.

3 new ones in the database = next best thing to EDC

Eugene and Stef called me up to say they were at the museum across the street from Electric Daisy Carnival (EDC). Now I know where to get cheep parking for any raves that take place in the L.A. Colliseum for future reference. They said half naked raver chicks were walking around the museum to kill time before EDC and parents of children were upset.

I can't believe I'm forced to miss EDC because I couldn't find anyone to go with and I'm never again driving to a rave all by myself. I'm so depressed.

I went to the gym to do day 4 of upper body pull muscles.

Eugene and Stef stopped by to drop off some flyers of upcoming raves for me. My mommy came home and bought us all some halo halo. Stef remarked that my pronouncing it with an American twang then resulted in Eugene following as such.

Then I had to record a gig for Paul and Martha's (Salina's parents) rock band at some sports bar and grill in Simi Valley.

CHICK AT FRONT: That will be $5. Wait, are you Ryan?
RYAN: Yeah.
CHICK AT FRONT: Nevermind. Go right in.

Yay, the band comped me. And the chick at the front was dark haired and dressed in black. She had one of those rare looks where it's like a Latina who kind of looks Asian. Anyway, she's in my database.

PAUL: I'm Paul. This is my buddy Ryan. What's your name?
BARTENDER: Trish.

Great. Now I can scream, "Trish" out loud when I'm busting a #3 to her. Trish looked like she could be Middle Eastern with clips in her dark, long hair. As part of her uniform, she had high sports socks.

PAUL: If you need a beer, just put it on our tab.

Damn, their base player kept going off screen as I kept getting distracted by chicks to the right. One of them was a blond chick in a dress who really wanted to dance, but the dudes she was with were kind of jaded. Well, we'll be dancing in my database later tonight.

MARTHA: So while I was singing, I noticed you kept looking to your right.

Damn it.

I followed their daughter Sable on the freeway back to their house. Burritos for dinner. Yummy. Then went home to bust a #3 to the new acquisitions in my database tonight.

Pity the fool

One of those Thursdays at the AMC 16 again. I saw Killers at 3:30PM. Surprisingly good directing. Then snuck into The A-Team at 5:10PM. It was worthy of carrying the nostalgia of the 80s TV show that it was based on. Then snuck into Toy Story 3 in 3D. Thank God for not giving back those 3D glasses and keeping them for myself for such future use. And this was a real tear jerker. Finally finished with Jonah Hex at 9:35PM. I'm sure everyone who busts a #3 to Megan Fox will love this one. Personally, I think her hotness is overrated.

There were 2 blond chicks, who look like they could be related - and most importantly, tall as chicks while shorter than me like cute chicks should be - in the arcade room. They are now in my database.

Cousin Janine's talent show high school graduation

I did half an hour of cardio at the gym before my mommy and I left for cousin Janine's high school graduation, which I-don't-know-why was held at Hollywood and Highlands of all places. It was more like a talent show than a graduation. Janine and a classmate sang a duet of When You Believe ... with a broken microphone. Hilarity ensued. There was one jackoffable chick who sang Hero.

Anyway, the security guard was some big (fat) black guy who was shorter than me that when he later wasn't letting back in people who had walked outside, I was able to stare him down until he let me back in. Yay self esteem!

Ate a lot and went to the gym late at night just for an hour of cardio. In other news, today was also Iam's last day working at GNC. So now both he and Brian are gone.

Good news: We were able to call Mark's work and find out that he's been showing up to work. So Mark is no longer missing. But we still don't know why he hasn't been returning anyone's messages.

I got to be teacher for the beginning of class

Mark called me at 3:00AM, but I didn't answer and went back to sleep. I would later regret this.

Guro was late for Filipino Martial Arts (FMA) training, so I had to begin the session as the teacher by training our new student Matt (obviously not to be confused with THE Matt). But I was late myself because I got lost. Kind of embarrassing when the new student arrives way before the teachers.

I had to take a nap and did my 4th day of upper body push muscles at the gym.

Then we found out that Mark's family claims he hasn't been home since last Saturday and no one can reach him. Mark's missing.

Return to Capoeira = Cutting toe nails for the 1st time since January 4

Guro called to reschedule Filipino Martial Arts (FMA) training. (Sarcastically) What a surprise. He made the excuse that the Lakers parade would've prevented us from meeting anyway and his freeway was blocked.

I watched last night's new episode of True Blood and then went to the gym for day 3 of my new upper body regiment for pull muscles. And then FINALLY I prepared to return to Capoeira. For everyone's safety since we kick barefoot, I cut my toe nails (now practically claws) for the 1st time since January 4!

Those present: Andres, Jesse 1, Louis, Diana, Steph (whom I haven't seen since last summer before she left for UCLA), and 2 new students who've started while I was gone named Marko and Slim. Carlito was dropped off at the sidewalk and joined us while we were running (while Diana and Steph, being typical girls, ditched running). Carlito brought his little 5-year-old relative, Chris, to try training. Now for my own boring reference ...

1st combination for warm-up: Meia lua de frente (front arch kick), meia lua de compasso (low to high spin kick) stretch, rasteira de cosa (spin sweep), cadera (chair), lunge, esquiva (dodge/evade), lunge.

1st 2-person drill:
1) Fighter A: Meia lua de frente. Fighter B: Esquiva.
2) Fighter B: Armada de cosa (spin kick). Fighter A: Steps mirror image, but spins opposite in a cadera for a vingativa (takedown).
3) Fighter B: Slides off into negativa (recovery).
4) Repeat.

Today's objective in the roda (circle of people): 1) Sweeps only. 2) Control the center. Everyone did sweeps, but only I understood "controlling the center." When Andres and Louis were against each other, Diana pushed me in to go against Louis. I bullied him against the corners ...

RYAN: (Taunting) Hey Louis. Guess what?
LOUIS: What?
RYAN: I'm controlling the center!
EVERYONE: (Taunting) Ooohhh ...
ANDRES: Time out! I think Ryan is the only one who's made that point!

Andres then lectured everyone on what I did correctly. Yay!

Did my 4th day of this current regiment for leg muscles at the gym and ended the night with WWE RAW.

Father's Day = I'd rather do shots than Miller beer

Father's Day was spent at Uncle Lando's house. The women watched New Moon (the Twilight sequel). I did shots of something while my uncles drank Miller beer. I'm usually a beer person, but not Miller. So I had to settle for shots of hard liquor.

The last AWS show

I did my 3rd day of upper body push muscles at the gym. Damn, I can't believe my abs are STILL sore from starting my abs regiment last Wednesday.

Then picked up Matt to go to City of Industry to watch the last Alternative Wrestling Show (AWS) ever. The last time I was there was last summer with Carlos and Michelle. But damn the card was terrible. It made Matt and I crave beer that during one match, we drove to the AM/PM, got lost, bought a 6-pack of Newcastle when we finally made it there, got lost coming back, and when we finally returned ... the same match was STILL going! Then for the 3-ring 159-person battle royale, the middle ring broke before it began under the weight of everyone.

Ended the night at Denny's. Busted a #3 to an old pro-wrestler named Nikki out of nostalgia when I got home.

Finally got to bust a #3 to Becky

I finally finished watching every episode of True Blood so far.

I rocked at guitar practice, which I originally cancelled, but un-cancelled when I found out that the LSAT prep center gave today as the wrong date for its "Do's and Don't's of Law School Admission" seminar.

Did my 3rd day of legs at the gym.

Then I came home to finally bust a #3 to Becky, whom I met last Tuesday, which I've been craving to do since I met her last Tuesday.

True Blood marathon > my own press conference

I was supposed to participate for a press conference for The Forgotten Jewel, that film that I was in. But had no idea it started at 2:30PM. Stayed at home instead marathoning True Blood.

Did my 2nd day of my current heavy lifting regiment for pull muscles.

Then it was off to pose as a Basketball fan again at the 35er Bar for what was called "Game 7" between the Lakers and the Celtics. I didn't understand the significance of "Game 7" until later ... when riots broke out on the news to "celebrate" the Lakers as Champions. Damn, I would hate to think what would've happened if they lost.

Security didn't even want to let me in because it was maximum capacity, but when they saw I wasn't going away, they let me in on the condition that I stay downstairs and unseen. Unfortunately, it was just Ben and Robert (whom I met last Tuesday). Robert's sister, Becky, didn't show up. But I can't wait to bust a #3 to her tomorrow. Mike and Tiffany couldn't make it because Mike had to work. Alex showed up later, having the same problem with security, but managed to talk his way through them.

Later we played pool over some burgers and Newcastles in the downstairs area of some diner called Jakes'.

Soon, I shall finally achieve "pussy magnet" status

I did my 2nd day of my new upper body regiment for push muscles. Gosh there was nothing to do today except continue marathoning True Blood and finish watching every episode of Eastbound and Down. Then went back to the gym late at night. Iam told me that Brian (formerly Brian at the GNC since he quit GNC 2 Mondays ago) was admitted to the emergency room two days ago after having a seizure. And Iam's last day at GNC will be on the 23rd.

Then I had an epiphany: For a while now, I've been buff. But apparently chicks prefer definition (translation: abs). So starting tonight, I've included an abs regiment. And I started it AFTER doing an hour of cardio! Soon, I shall finally achieve "pussy magnet" status.

Pretending to be a basketball fan in a sports bar

Well, I woke up at around 4:00AM due to a nocturnal emission and had to clean up. I had a weird dream that I was picking up some Latina chick, who I've never seen before in real life, for a date. When meeting her family, the chick started giving me a lap dance as her family cheered her on. Weird, I know. When I felt I was about to ejaculate in the dream, I managed to get my pants off in time ... BUT only to wake up in the real world and discover that I still got wet. Went back to sleep after cleaning up.

I did my 2nd day of this new heavy lifting regiment for legs at the gym, rocked at guitar practice, and then busted a #3 to actress Katy Mixon from Eastbound and Down.

And then it was time to pretend to be a basketball fan, despite not knowing shit about basketball, as my old LSAT prep classmates Ben and Mike invited me to hang out with them at the 35er bar in Pasadena for the Lakers versus Celtics game. Mike's girlfriend, Tiffany, was with him. Ben's friends were named Robert, Becky, Alex, Jeremy, and Richard.

• Becky and Robert are siblings from La Crescenta and are Irish whose lineage traces to William the Conqueror.
• Becky and Alex work together at some BBQ place in Montrose where Becky has a stalker.
• I need to bust a #3 to Becky as soon as possible.

BECKY: Can I ask you a weird question? What shampoo are you using?
RYAN: I was using Head & Shoulders today.
BECKY: Because it smells really good!

• I'm the only one who pronounces Celtics correctly while everyone pronounces it as Seltics.
• Mike and Ben bought pitchers of Heineken, Robert bought pitchers of Blue Moon Honey Moon, and I bought pitchers of Sam Adams.
• The bar was giving away free hotdogs!
• Supposedly, seasonal flavors of Newcastle exist.
• Jeremy generously bought a few of us beers, mine being Sam Adams.

ALEX: What's your number?
JEREMY: This is gonna sound really gay, but ... Facebook me.
BECKY: Wait, what?!
JEREMY: I said, "Facebook me."
BECKY: Oh! I thought you said something else.
RYAN: I know what you were thinking!

(She thought he said, "Face-fuck me.")

• Alex drunkenly thinks Rap Music wouldn't be any good without Kurt Cobain. (Like, what the fuck?)
• Robert then drunkenly rapped as a comeback towards Alex's Kurt Cobain comment.
• Me drunkenly doing Vanilla Ice's Ice Ice Baby on kareoke was introduced in the conversation, in which Alex wanted to challenge me with his covers of Journey songs.
• Somehow, Twilight came up and I shared how I was Jacob Black for Halloween, which prompted Becky to share that she thought Jacob was cuter than Edward. (Gosh, I need to bang this chick.)
• Robert (keeping in mind he's white) drunkenly started trashing white people, saying, "Fuck English, fuck Germans," etc.
• Robert drunkenly nearly took off his shirt, which I shared with Becky as we passed by each other on my way to the restroom and she adorably ran to babysit him.
• After me, chicks started using the guys' restroom because there was a line for the chicks' restroom.

ROBERT: (Referring to me) I like this guy. [High-fives me.]
ALEX: (Drunkenly follows) Me too. [High-fives me.]
RICHARD: (Drunkenly follows) Yeah, you're cool people. [High-fives me]

Almost a Manic Monday

I woke up at around 7:00AM to respond to Guro's text about cancelling Filipino Martial Arts (FMA) training. I went back to sleep and had a weird dream about cuddling with some blond chick who I've never seen before, explaining to her how I had to wake up at 7:00AM and how I'm not a bad person just because I go to raves. Weird, I know.

It was almost a shitty day. But I watched some Eastbound and Down and finished season 1 of True Blood. Then went to the gym and started a new heavy lifting regiment for pull muscles (yesterday being push muscles). Ended the day with WWE RAW, even if it is lackluster without Bryan Danielson since he got released for using a Daniel Benoit-style choke.

What is standing-up-sex called anyway?

Church, started a new regiment for push muscles (upper body) at the gym, then went to the mall. I guess I missed Jazz. Boo. My mommy and I ate dinner at Cheesecake Factory. I think our waitress' name was Jessica. She's all right, but I didn't feel like putting her in my database. I did recognize Anita walking around, though. She's the waitress who's got the really long and dark hair in a ponytail, which I've mentioned must be fun to pull on during the old in-out in-out - as they they in A Clockwork Orange. But this time, it was all up in a ball. I've mentioned she's tall for a girl, but shorter than me like cute girls should be, and looks light enough without being anorexic for me to carry during standing-up-sex - or whatever it's called - like how they do sometimes in porn. Sipping on green tea now.

I got to see Rogue's tits

I worked out my legs at the gym. That personal trainer Debbie tried to straighten her red hair. It looks better naturally curly. But, still, when she bent over in front of me, I felt like - as they say in A Clockwork Orange - having the in-out in-out with her. Then as soon as my mommy went to work I spent the Saturday marathoning True Blood, which I can only watch when my mommy's not home due to all the nudity. Anna Paquin (who played Rogue in the X-Men trilogy) stars in it and I got to see her tits! I saw Rogue's tits! Afterward, I busted a #3 to that chick who normally wears the flower on her ear at the PWG shows and, wow, that one shot like a rocket.

Blah, blah, blah with a smile = Lisa and I having verbal sex

Back to the old LSAT prep center for a workshop on how to write the Personal Statement in law school applications. I was late and there were only 2 chicks there, the same chick douchebags who walked in during my last practice test and I had to kick them out (see entry 6-4-10). It was being taught by Kate, whom Mike and I met last Monday when we missed our seminar because our LSAT went overtime. And then Ben walked in late. Yay, a familiar face.

• Kate was celebrating her "ReBirthday," or the anniversary of her open heart surgery.
• Kate's a writer and she says I'm "[her] kind of man" because I want to pursue Entertainment Law.
• Kate's impressed that I'm a stuntman.
• My ignoble goal for pursuing law is "To put my feet up on the couch with better shoes" whereas everyone else's boring goal was "Money."
• I've been established as the guy who screams, "Have my babies" at Kelly Clarkson concerts.
• The best theme for my Personal Statement might be "Sufficiency versus Excess," which could apply from Martial Arts to Entertainment Law.

RYAN: Most valuable lesson learned was probably from my instructor: the difference between self defense and excessive force.
KATE: That would be a great Personal Statement! [Turns to Ben] He's a stuntman. He's awesome.

You know, she's not too much of a looker, but she's still far from ugly. She's in her mid 30s, but not too old. I'd bang her just for being semi-flirty with me. Attitude-wise, she would've made a great stripper.

KATE: Have a nice weekend. And Ryan's my future Entertainment Lawyer.

Matt and I went to PWG. Bartender Lisa was there again after missing the last two shows, which the asian bartender (name's pronounced Re-shawn, but not sure how it's spelled) adorably did not appreciate since it left her to work alone. I used the news of Michelle expecting another little one as an excuse to talk to Lisa. Lisa responded with a smile, "Blah, blah, blah" -- OK, I didn't hear anything she said because I was too focused on her smiling at me and thinking it's like we're having verbal sex. But most likely she was saying, "Congratulations" to Michelle.

The chick who normally wears the flower on her ear was there. She's renewed in my database. I talked to Samantha during intermission. The conversation actually turned to ...

SAMANTHA: I'm sure I know who you're talking about (in terms of who's in your database).
RYAN: Uh oh.
SAMANTHA: I'll just assume I'm not in that group.
RYAN: No, you're not! I swear!

But Sam does sit with the same group that includes the chick who normally wears the flower on her ear, whom I'm also be busting a #3 to later.

Also, the chick that Chad and I both bust a #3 to was there as well. And so I texted Chad, who was absent. Chad texted back that he wanted to go, but "got kidnapped" and sent me a picture message of all these cholos.

Downside: I can't believe all they had was Bud Light and Miller Light on tap. So we downed two pitchers of Bud Light because Lisa said Bud tasted better than Miller. Matt and I ate at Norm's in North Hollywood later.

Return to sneaking into movies

Ah, I finally got to go back to one of my old Thursday habits now that LSAT prep class is over. I went to the AMC 16 in Burbank and got the student discount with my old college ID, only available on Thursdays. I watched Letters to Juliet. Taylor Swift (specifically the guitar rift in Love Story) on the soundtrack gets my adrenaline going. Then snuck into Iron-Man 2. I guess Gwyneth Paltrow still looks jackoffable in her 30s. Then snuck into Prince of Persia. This new actress in it named Gemma Arterton is jackoffable as well.

Afterward, I walked across the street for some impromptu hookah with Mark. He'd been craving to redo hookah since the last time when we had to leave early because of a family emergency (see entry 5-14-10). His mom's operation went well.

A cursed day in Hollywood

I watched the first epsiode of True Blood today. I'm considering marathoning it since I now have free time.

Eugene, Stef, Jun, and Kate picked me up. Kate is Jun's cousin who was also in their play. The plan was to go to Rose Tea Garden and interview her for their DVD. I set up the scene really nice. But they need a boom mic.

They've also fired their actress Anieszka because she's fucking her artist roommate who's 50 years older than her in exchange for free rent.

At Stef's house, I found out what they thought about Carlomar, Guro's 2nd in command in Filipino Martial Arts (FMA): Eugene's surpassed him as he's published and doing web design while Carlo's "still playing with sticks."

Went to Pigs and Whistles, a pub in Hollywood, to watch some open mic featuring Stef's friend Tien. They had Sam Adams Summer Ale on tap ... But when they poured it, nothing except foam came out and they were like, "Sorry." I had to settle for Guinness. I didn't tip them. They dogged me. I didn't care.

The first comedian got pissed off that nobody was laughing at any of his jokes, so he bitterly ended it by picking on Stef and Tien, implying that they've taken a bunch of cocks. Eugene then scared him away that he left! This one singer who was Filipino recognized us as Filipino, so he sang one of his half-English/half-Tagalog songs. He gave us his CDs entitled Ernie in Denial. Tien did her covers of Weezer's Say It Ain't So and Paramore's Misery Business on the piano.

I accidentally kicked over this chick's guitar case. But she was timid and OK about it. She ended up being the best singer. I hit her up afterward. Her name's Aliya Hashemi from Seattle and she's only been here for four months.

Eugene still being pissed at the first comedien then triggered him being pissed about how Stef gets hit on a lot. And I was pissed at that cock tease of running out of Sam Adams when they tried to pour it for me. So the only thing that made it all better was some Pad Thai at Sanam in North Hollywood.

Journey

I busted a #3 to that chick sitting to my right at the LSAT yesterday. Since I had sworn off busting #3s along with alcohol a week-and-a-half ago until after the LSAT was done, this #3 session shot like a rocket!

I went to guitar practice. It was aight today. And then Lucine saw me at the Americana ...

LUCINE: How are you?
RYAN: I took the LSAT yesterday.
LUCINE: So did I ... It was a disaster!

Gosh, now I feel bad for being one of the people who pressured her to "man up" and take this test. She also introduced her little boy who was with her. Now I feel weird for busting a #3 to her that one time. But it only happened once.

My mommy and I ate at Rubio's.

Then I went to vote in my first California election that didn't involve the presidency. I feel like such a grown-up! I had no idea who a bunch of the people on the ballot were. Basically, I avoided any name with military or prosecutor descriptions. I voted for a Latino name whenever possible to avoid Arizona's fate. And avoided any armenian names. The older woman working the front desk was jackoffable.

Now that LSAT prep classes are over, it felt great being able to watch the season finale of Glee, entitled Journey featuring a medley of Journey songs, while it aired instead of having to wait until the next day to catch it on Hulu.com. Ended the night with the season premiere of WWE NXT.

FIGHT DAY

I woke up before 8:00AM BEFORE the alarm clock could even ring, yelling and screaming like a warrior! I had some steak, brocolli, and homemade fruit juice for breakfast. Drove to Mike's place where I got to park in his garage for free as oposed to paying a shitload for parking at the Sheraton where our LSAT was being conducted. We ate some salmon and then took the bus (in the spirit of Eminem in the movie 8 Mile) a few blocks down to the Sheraton. And it was go time!

Downside #1: I might've gotten stuck on 1 section.
Downside #2: I accidentally induced a jittery sugar rush during the break that was a pain in the ass to tame when we resumed testing.
Bright side #1: Other than that, I rocked.
Bright side #2: The chick to my right was really jackoffable. She was all covered up, dressed in black. But she had the prettiest face with long, dark hair tied back in a ponytail. She's so in my database.

Mike and I tried to walk to the Personal Statement seminar that we signed up for. We got lost. By the time we found it, it was over. Boo.

We ate and drank beers at Wokano. His girlfriend, Tiffany, joined us. I had Newcastles on tap. Mike was down on himself. This is his 4th and last time taking the LSAT. I can't wait to take it a 2nd time in October. Also, all three of us drive Hondas. Tiffany and I have identical Hondas, the only differences being that hers has only two doors and a sunroof while mine has a spoiler.

Got home. Caught some of WWE Raw, which had the best ending in a long time, featuring Bryan "Daniel Bryan" Danielson. And FINALLY crashed.

'Cause ain't no such things as halfway crooks

Today's assignment is actually to do absolutely nothing regarding the LSAT so that our brains are recharged tomorrow when we actually take the LSAT. In fact, the assignment was to watch 8 Mile because it's "an uplifting story," an idea that Sissy credited to me. Unfortunately, I couldn't find my 8 Mile DVD, so I had to watch any available clips of it all over the internet.

Digital devices aren't allowed tomorrow in the testing room, so I had to dig up my old Rolex that I haven't worn in years so that I can pace myself during the test.

Unexpectedly, while walking around the Red Robin, Jazz was walking out to go home from work. Mental note regarding her schedule: This was around 5:15PM. But she was walking with a coworker. Cockblock! You can't intrude on 2 chicks while they're talking. But as I walked pass her, I imagined my penis brushing against her. NOW I'm fired up to take the LSAT tomorrow.

Mommy and I went to Minx for dinner only to find out, along with other would-be customers, that Minx began closing early due to lack of business. So we went to Panda Inn.

Discipine

A Saturday without beer, porn, or busting a #3. Why? Because I've sworn it all off until after the LSAT on Monday.

I'd have to manually force a boner if I had to

I had supernatural attentiveness again thanks to Heather's gift. I showed up for one last LSAT practice test. It was just me and the older chick who said my Hermione shirt was "adorable." I smiled. She winked at me. I would never be able to subconsciously get a boner for her. I'd have to manually force it if I had to. She'd never be in my database. She's easily in her 30s, possibly 40s. But she's not ugly either, so the point is: I guess it would be bearable to have sex with her if I had to, just because she's nice. Anyway, her name's Marilyn.

MARILYN: So I take it you're a Harry Potter fan?
RYAN: Yeah. And you?
MARILYN: I only read the 1st book.
RYAN: They got one more book to film, but they're splitting it into two movies.
MARILYN: (Appalled) There's ANOTHER one?
RYAN: And it's gonna be in 3D.
MARILYN: I'm just glad they've gotten kids to read. They could be reading porn for all I care just as long as they're reading.

Then she tried to chicken out of the writing portion at the end, whining that she's tired and blah, blah, blah. But the test proctor and I pressured her to stay. But I might've been overly dramatic with it like a coach berating his fighter at his corner inside a UFC cage.

MARILYN: Ok, fine! I'll stay. (Sarcastically) Thanks, Ryan! [Rolls eyes]

And a couple of chick douche bags walked inside the classroom before the practice test was over and I kicked them out. But they apologized afterward. Superiority! Marilyn says she'll be using her free time before waiting to hear from law schools to pursue Brad Pitt. Good luck with that. She'll need it.

Headphones

I had to use my LSAT prep class's computer room. The chick who once said that her cousin lives on my street was working the front desk. I asked for headphones. For some reason, it was hard labor for her getting the cabinet open. To screw with her, I asked for different headphones. She hated me.

I did jack shit today except review videos of lessons and study.

Hormones hurt

I showed up for a practice test for LSAT. It was just me, Juan, Ginger, a classmate named Christine who rarely showed up, and the same older chick who said my Hermione shirt was "adorable" last Sunday. Sissy dropped by to brag that we were her kids. I volunteered to stay for the writing portion of the exam last second and felt like a warrior.

Highlight: Ginger and I were the last two people left and I finished before her, thus demonstrating intellectual superiority! Take that, you I-have-a-boyfriend-thus-Ryan-is-cockblocked slut! Still, she looked adorably jackoffable sitting with her right leg folded in and her head on her right hand, looking bored. The ends of her toe nails were painted white.

Oh, and my score went up. I studied, watched last night's episode of Glee on Hulu.com and ended the night with The Ultimate Fighter. My letter to Tiwat (who's still in jail) on his Facebook read:

Dear Tiwat,

Now that my LSAT prep class is over, I might never again see the 2 chick classmates (Ginger and Jackie) whom I like masturbating to. This is probably the closest I'll ever get to being heart-broken. Hormones hurt :-(

And the LSAT prep class journey ends with ... ultimate cockblock

I spent the whole day studying nonstop easily and loving it, all thanks to a little gift from Heather that I got last time I saw her (see entry 5-22-10). I texted Mike my progress and he thanked me for being the experimentee.

Then I went to my last LSAT prep class.

• The people who showed up were: Ben, Brady, Juan, Mike, Lucine, Jackie, and Ginger.
• I was bummed Vanessa didn't show up so that I could 1) try to convince her one last time to take the LSAT this Monday and 2) get her number for hopefully a booty call since she always showed signs of liking me because, although she's not in my database, she's not ugly either and it's better than nothing.
• Ginger made a couple of mistakes, which was a big deal to me because she's almost looked like a perfect genius, but now she became less intimidating. Yay.
• But then I made more mistakes when Sissy was randomly calling on us to answer questions. Boo.
• I started having a weird crash during class, but unexpectedly felt normal again after eating a banana.
• I think Mike caught me looking at Ginger and he gave me a knowing smile.
• Brady left early, joking that he didn't want to ruin his average (since he was usually either late or left early).
• Lucine saw me in the hallway as she was leaving early because she had an interview to go to and wished me luck on the LSAT.
• Janie has had a fever for almost 2 weeks now. Yikes!
• I'm bummed Beatrize never returned after I first noticed she was absent. Never got to say goodbye. But I suppose she will always be in my database.
• Oh, and the ultimate cockblock in terms of this class: Ginger has a boyfriend. What a slut.

I shared some of Heather's gift to me with Mike so that he can also study supernaturally attentively and gain confidence. Ended the night with WWE NXT.