Yeah, she be noticing me

I went to the 5:45PM Krav Maga class today because the dude instructor yesterday said that it was taught by some chick who's "a real animal." It didn't disappoint. I figured the chick instructor looked Jewish, but then I saw a cross tattooed on her arm, so maybe not.

• My favorite drill was jab with the left, cross with the right, and elbow also with the right.
• During this drill, Pantera's Walk started playing on their sound system and I felt like Rob Van Dam (because that was his old theme music).
• Then we added on to the drill by getting full mount on a huge pad and ground-and-pounding it with elbows whenever the chick instructor yelled, "Down!"
• Keep in mind that 1 hand is planted on the ground at the side of your victim's head while you throw the elbow at the face.
• Also posture, or sit up so that your victim can't grab you and pull you down.

CHICK INSTRUCTOR: Did you do Tae Kwon Do or Karate? 'Cause you got that type of stance.
RYAN: I did a lot of things. (Yeah, she be noticing me)

Also, the 7 elbows in Krav Maga are:

• Horizontal elbow to face when facing attacker.
• Horizontal back elbow to face when attacker is at your side.
• Horizontal back elbow to face when attacker is behind you.
• Vertical upward back elbow to sternum when attacker is behind you.
• Vertical uppercut back elbow to chin when attacker is behind you.
• Vertical uppercut elbow to chin when facing attacker.
• Vertical downward elbow to the back of attacker's head, neck or back if attacker ever bends over.

I visited Brian at the GNC.

RYAN: The Krav Maga teacher was plain-looking, but I'd still hit it out of principle.
BRIAN: Oh yeah, definitely.
RYAN: It's the same idea how we'd hit Kyra Gracie out of principle.
BRIAN: Exactly! Just to say we fucked a Gracie.

Oh, and I was crossing the crosswalk from the Glendale Marketplace to the Glendale Galleria and some bitch driving with her eyes off the road nearly hit me. Of course I already know she had to be an armo!