"... the cool guy with nice eyes lol" - Jazz

Day #11 in the Philippines. (Not déjà vu - Author's note: Even if you are seeing this for the first time as of 1/6/11 regardless of the time stamp to conform with updating daily.)

This was accomplished right before midnight on New Year's Eve, but it deserved its own entry due to the epicness of it. I hadn't seen Jazz work at Red Robin since last 5/28/11. Every friendship I made at Red Robin was out of a contingency plan to reach her in case she ever left before I could talk to her. It was time ...

I found her Facebook page through Dennis.' I addressed her as "Jazzy," as her name tag used to say, and I introduced myself as a stranger with mutual friends. I told her she need not reply as saying, "Hi," at this point was something I needed to do for myself. BUT she replied:

1) She remembered me ... and she and her coworkers would refer to me as "the cool guy with nice eyes lol." (Yes, her quote obviously as I don't do "lol's.") HO. LY. CRAP ... I actually had a nickname among them!

2) She says that I was always a pleasure to serve and that we could possibly run into each other because she visits occasionally.

Oh, the forces of Coincidence and Happenstance have been good to me before. I hope they're good to me now.

Gosh, I still remember those summer nights as far back as two years ago, proverbially tossing and turning because of a heat wave unfit for sleep. So I would get out of bed, bust a #3 to Jazz and finally be able to fall asleep.

Somewhere I got lost and carried away with the database, so to retrace my steps: Whenever Jazz wasn't working, originally Dani from Hot Topic was the lone "substitute" in the database. Dani quit and Georgia became the new "substitute." Leah became the "substitute" when none of the above were available. Then there came Candice and finally Carissa, all of the above from Hot Topic. Expanding outside of Hot Topic, there was Faith from Brookstone, Jessica from American Basics, and that chick from Waba Grill Teriyaki House who was more jackoffable as a blond before dying her hair dark brown. Matt once metaphorically described me as a sailor with a wench at every port. All the "substitutes" (even "substitutes" of "substitutes") are fun busting a #3 to, but they're not my Jazz.

Since I last saw Jazz, I've added to the regular database the Adele look-alike from the i Play & Talk kiosk, Dana from Lush, and the ethnically ambiguous Monica from Barnes & Noble. But at that point it was only out of methadone and habit.

But with her parting words to me that I was always "the cool guy with nice eyes [lol]" in response to finally telling her, "Hi," I now finally have closure. WE - or anyone who's followed my hormonal journey (which is literally only Michelle and Carlos in Nebraska, Matt currently in Japan, and Tiwat exiled in an undisclosed location) - have closure.

Yester-year, I said, "Hi," to a girl. This year, I might actually ask a girl out. Cheers to baby steps!

Sincerely,
The Cool Guy with Nice Eyes

P.S. This will serve as a mid-season finale, so I have an excuse to be lazy from blogging while I'm busy in the Philippines.

Time Travel: Part Two

Day #10 in the Philippines. (Not déjà vu - Author's note: Even if you are seeing this for the first time as of 1/6/11 regardless of the time stamp to conform with updating daily.)

No one paid attention to any countdown to midnight. I was helping set up a one-hundred-foot-long rope of fireworks when someone informed us that it was already past midnight and we were like, (too focused on work) "Oh."

The tall red Christmas hat that I got from Spencer's one year ago, but didn't debut until arriving in the Philippines last 12/23/11, made its return before midnight. I also debuted my John Cena Rise Above Hate shirt that I bought at Hot Topic last Black Friday.

I have forty minutes of video of just fireworks, including footage of nearly blowing myself up trying to light one. At one point, a firework blew up a power line and the neighborhood had no electricity as the explosions in the sky were the only light.

Anyway, with the Philippines fourteen hours ahead of the U.S. in time zones, I'm technically TIME TRAVELING as I'm literally in 2012 wishing everyone back home, who are still stuck in 2011, a HAPPY NEW YEAR. Even after a good night's sleep, I'm still in the future of 2012 while some of the world is still stuck in the past of 2011. As Matt, who's studying abroad in Japan right now, told me via email, it's great to be Michael J. Fox as Marty McFly for a day. TIME TRAVEL, BABY!

Time Travel: Part One

Day #9 in the Philippines. (Not déjà vu - Author's note: Even if you are seeing this for the first time as of 1/6/11 regardless of the time stamp to conform with updating daily.)

Sheila's in-laws are here at our ancestral house. There's more of them. From what I've been eavesdropping on, some of them are from the U.S. There's this one really skinny guy that's either emo or hipster - sometimes I can't tell the difference - who's wearing a jean vest, boots, and has butterfly tattoos on the side of his neck. The adults are making fun of him behind his back. Conversely, I'm making fun of him in silence ... Who the heck wears boots in the Philippines? (Although, I think the uptight adults are making fun of him for being "obviously gay" and not for his boots.)

I just found Niels, my Top Rocking classmate whom I last saw on 10/29/11 before he went back to Amsterdam, on Facebook. He's already messaged me back. Yay.

Cousin Philip paid the technician extra to come in tonight to fix the wireless internet.

There's some fancy caterers downstairs. We're actually drinking out of goblets. While in Boracay, I discovered something called Tanduay Ice. I'm on my second one right now. But cousin Philip, the big bad ass attorney who's made headlines for putting celebrities away in jail, is already drunk off only one bottle!

Time to go light some fireworks.

That awkward moment when you're buying fireworks and the sex workers are across the block

Day #8 in the Philippines. (Not déjà vu - Author's note: Even if you are seeing this for the first time as of 1/6/11 regardless of the time stamp to conform with updating daily.)

I had a dream last night that I was doing a database run at the mall in my regular stomping grounds back home. There were some inaccuracies, though: Carissa, who in real life is the manager at Hot Topic, was working at Brookstone. I think she was wearing a green top. Also, in the dream, Brookstone was on the first floor whereas in real life it's on the second floor. And some random guy whom I don't recognize in real life said, "What's up," to me. End of dream.

We were at the Trinoma mall and the baby nieces couldn't finish their McDonalds, so I finished it for them.

Due to the time difference between the Philippines and the U.S., I have to wait until tomorrow for UFC 141 to air and then a while more to look for it online afterward.

Cousin Philip enlisted my help to choose fireworks. Conveniently, someone, probably a fireworks addict, had already uploaded videos of almost each brand in action on Youtube.com. The driver Bernie, dad's former caretaker Apyong, cousin Philip, and I rolled out. Mental note: There's a Papa John's Pizza across the street from the fireworks vendor.

"Saint Nicholas"

Day #7 in the Philippines. (Not déjà vu - Author's note: Even if you are seeing this for the first time as of 1/6/11 regardless of the time stamp to conform with updating daily.)

We did some island hopping in the morning. We almost had to turn back because of strong winds. Everyone was in favor of turning around, cousin Philip was undecided, but I was the only one who implied, "Man up." We kept moving.

On one island, the wind blew off one of mommy's diamond earrings. Everyone searched a long time for it until ten-year-old nephew, Nicholas, used knowledge of physics to pinpoint and locate it. He has been nicknamed "Saint Nicholas." Only ten-years-old ... And what are you doing with your life?

Later, while we anchored the boat so that a few can go snorkeling, some canoe pulled up to sell ice cream. I repeat, they sell ice cream in the ocean here. Dope.

On the boat ride back to the airport, I sat next to some butch-looking chick with an unidentifiable European accent, though she was speaking English, and who looked like she was trying to grow a mullet. She was probably the weirdest tourist I've seen.

Back on the mainland, we were eating in some rundown restaurant when three-year-old niece, "Princess" Maxine, tried to lay down the law again.

MAXINE: Ayaw ko dito! (I don't like it here!)
COUSIN-IN-LAW MALOU: Where do you want?
MAXINE: Trinoma!

Trinoma is a fancy mall. God help everyone when this three-year-old "princess" gets older. Anyway, our flight was delayed.

RYAN: (Sarcastically) Cool!
COUSIN SHEILA: (Oblivious to sarcasm) No, it's not!

♫ Josie's on a vacation far away ♪

Day #6 in the Philippines. (Not déjà vu - Author's note: Even if you are seeing this for the first time as of 1/6/11 regardless of the time stamp to conform with updating daily.)

Gosh darn it! Cliff-diving was unavailable due to terrain problems! Blue balls!

I went jet-skiing for the first time in my life. The only time I've remotely gone jet-skiing was as a video game character in the Grand Theft Auto series. The first thing I did was drive in the wrong direction and it stalled every few minutes, but once I was able to drive it like a professional - albeit not until the final few minutes - I sang out loud to the open sea The Outfield's 1986 hit Your Love.

♫ Josie's on a vacation far away ♪ Come around and talk it over ♬

White chicks were totally eye-fucking me! It makes sense that, since they were traveling to the land of my ethnicity after all, I would be their ideal. I don't get that kind of love in euro-centric Hollywood. Cue CM Punk's theme music, Living Colour's Cult of Personality!

I redeemed my complimentary welcome drink ticket for a Pineapple Cooler (blue curacao, pineapple, coconut, fresh milk) as I updated my My Facebook status:

Day #6 in the Philippines. Finally have internet access here in Boracay. Just found out this island's been voted 2nd best tourist spot in the world. Going back to the city tomorrow. But first, strutting like a werewolf god among these white chicks.

The people who "thumbs-up'd" it: Crystal from high school, Samantha from PWG, and Heather's sister Naomi. I had a boner for the latter.

I bought some postcards for people and a white, thin hooded vest that I can't wait to rock in the U.S. when it get warmer this Spring-Summer.

The Filipino cover band that played while we ate dinner was descent. I might actually consider banging the chick who was one of the lead vocalists despite her possibly being a fob. Interesting note: One of the band members was with a blond chick. Yes! I love how these white chicks got love for the Filipino cock here! Take that, euro-centric homeland of Hollywood!

Speaking of which, two white girls were totally eye-fucking me as I walked past them on the beach. After a few paces, I turned around ... and they were STILL eye-fucking me! YES! I repeat: Take that euro-centric homeland of Hollywood.

I'm basically a civilian soldier ... or a Civilian SEAL. I like the sound of that.

Day #5 in the Philippines. (Not déjà vu - Author's note: Even if you are seeing this for the first time as of 1/6/11 regardless of the time stamp to conform with updating daily.)

We left for Boracay today. Auntie Aida tagged along with us.

Within a couple of hours, we took a plane to Kalibo, took a shuttle to the docks, took a boat to Boracay's docks, and finally took another shuttle to the hotel. It's worth noting that the narrow bridge to get from the dock to the boat, during heavy winds, had no railings! Yeah, the above two hours made me feel like I was in the military on a mission. The only difference at this point is that I wasn't at risk of getting shot at. Poor nephew Nicholas had motion sickness, though.

There was this white chick on the same flight as us. She had natural blond, curly, shoulder length hair and brown eyes, unlike the cliche blond/blue combo. I was able to input a variety of details in the database from her wardrobe change (i.e. with a coat, without a coat) to seeing her tie/untie her hair.

The Boracay Regency Hotel is so nice.

I didn't ride the horse, the horse rode me

Day #4 in the Philippines. (Not déjà vu - Author's note: Even if you are seeing this for the first time as of 1/6/11 regardless of the time stamp to conform with updating daily.)

It's mommy's Birthday today.

The kids - nieces Samantha, Maxine, Juliana, and nephew Nicholas - went strawberry picking. I bought a belated Christmas present for Mark. My mommy protested it. I'm resisting to keep it for myself. I'm definitely going to have to check it in at the airport. Before I left for the Philippines last Wednesday, I opened Mark's present for me. It was a huge Das Boot for beer. Awesome.

The kids and I went horseback riding. Rather, since I apparently didn't know how to steer the horse, the horse took its own joyride. I was just the horse's hostage.

The whole day was spent in the car.

MAXINE: Ako ng Princess. Ako ng Snow White. (I am Princess. I am Snow White.)

Cute.

Speaking of cuteness, at a gas station a possibly homeless little kid relentless sang Christmas carols to us. Most of our time at said station was looking for any spare coins or cash. Finally, I had gathered enough cash to give him, which prompted him to finally go away to search for his next caroling victim.

COUSIN PHILIP: See his smile!

"Princess"

Day #3 in the Philippines. (Not déjà vu - Author's note: Even if you are seeing this for the first time as of 1/6/11 regardless of the time stamp to conform with updating daily.)

We went to Paniqui to visit dad in the cemetery as well as all relatives who had gone before us. I saw Bong for the first time since 3/10/12 when he met us there to open the crypt.

Maxine has given herself the middle name of "Princess." She's only three-years-old. God help us all when she gets older.

From there, we headed to Baguio City. I haven't been here since I was ten years old. I ate at the all-you-can-eat buffet for dinner while everyone else ordered from the menu. That Fettucini Alfredo that I was able to have the chef incorporate peppers, olives, capers, mushrooms, and tomatoes into was bomb. "Bomb," as the kids from my generation like to say; not this "for the win" crap.

My tall red Christmas hat rivals the Pope's fancy hat

Day #2 in the Philippines. (Not déjà vu - Author's note: Even if you are seeing this for the first time as of 1/6/11 regardless of the time stamp to conform with updating daily.)

I had a weird dream last night that I was on a duplicate Earth. It most likely has to do with how in real life I watched that indy film Another Earth during the flight. End of dream.

It was nice to eat sisig today. That would be parts of a pig's head and liver seasoned with calamansi and chili peppers. It was fun watching a kid among cousin Sheila's in-laws have a tantrum because we put extra calamansi, which he hates, on the sisig.

And it's Christmas Eve: the typical Simbang Gabi mass at Church followed by Noche Buena dinner at midnight, this year at cousin Sheila's in-laws' place. We have pictures of mommy asleep during Church. I also chose to wait until the donations collector was right in front of mommy before waking her up just to see her startled reaction.

Time Lag

Day #1 in the Philippines. (Author's note: Even if you are seeing this for the first time as of 1/6/11 regardless of the time stamp to conform with updating daily.)

Mommy regrets taking Korean Airlines just to save a few hundred bucks. We had a layover in Korea for two hours where I shopped in the airport. I can now say I've shopped in Korea.

On the flight, I watched some American movie, apparently an indy film from either last year or earlier this year, called Another Earth. I mostly listened to Muse's latest album available on the flight's entertainment.

I had two weird dreams while sleeping on the flight: 1) Cousin Andree and I were practicing punches to the solar plexus. 2) I was in a mall that I didn't recognize. In a bar, there was an open challenge for a four-way brawl. The participants were me, Brandon, and Rez and John from high school. The last two are clique mates in real life. But John would magically transform into Michael, also their clique mate. I won. I remember transitioning from a guillotine choke on Rez and spinning into a rear naked choke on John/Michael. End of dreams.

Cousin Philip and Cousin-in-law Malou picked mommy and me up from the airport. I wore my tall red Christmas hat that I bought from Spencer's last year. We ate lunch at cousin Sheila's in-laws' place before going home to unpack. The one-eyed maid, Linda, clumsily tripped and fell down as she greeted me. Other returning cast of characters from last time: the driver Bernie, dad's former caretaker Apyong, the maids/nannies Lisa and Flor, and baby nieces Samantha and Maxine.

And now time lag - a term coined by Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles - as opposed to jet lag. You know, because I left on Wednesday, but because the Philippines in fourteen hours ahead of the U.S., I arrived now on a Friday, thus time traveling over Thursday.

MOMMY: Did you visit your dad's room yet?
RYAN: No.
MOMMY: Go in there and say, "Hi."

I walked into dad's old room, stood in the darkness, felt an unfamiliar sixth sense, and said, "Hi."

"Where you going? Hogwarts?

My mommy's sister apparently arrived at around midnight last night to pack some things for us to "mule" - as video/computer gamers call it - to the Philippines. I slept in my bed for the first time in eleven months as my overly superstitious mommy hasn't let me done so, claiming that the location of my room was a designated "bad luck location" for me during this time period.

I woke up and went to Jamba Juice for one last $1 Oatmeal Wednesday. I had tried all the toppings by now and went with what I've decided was my favorite one: Berry Cherry Pecan.

I stopped by Barnes & Noble and bought my Christmas presents to myself: 1) The Men's Health Big Book of Food and Nutrition, 2) Neil Gaiman's American Gods and Anansi Boys as one thick book, and 3) C.S. Lewis' The Chronicles of Narnia as one thick book.

I walked by Hot Topic. Carissa was working. She was bobbing her head to whatever music was playing. Her hair was cute - tied back, bangs combed to the left. It's so nice to renew a regular in the database in my final hours in the country for this year.

Lastly, I stopped by the gym to freeze my account for one month.

EMPLOYEE: That's a snazzy tie.
RYAN: Thanks. It's Harry Potter.
EMPLOYEE: I know. I was gonna say, "Where you going? Hogwarts?"

Now it's time to finish packing as Uncle Oca has arrived to help.

We Circumcised Boys > you uncircumcised girly men

I had a couple of weird dreams last night: 1) I was UFC fighter Diego Sanchez. I was with Puck from FOX TV's Glee and some other people. I fought off a guy with a fake sword with the finishing blow to behind their knees. Puck didn't approve. 2) I was in the Philippines. Mark said, "Fuck it," as he visited me in my room where I was oversleeping. It looked like the bonus room in cousin Andree's house. Justin and I played cards where the deck annoyingly had inverted cards as well as right side up. I was playing Final Fantasy VII. My agenda was to get the "Knights of the Round" Materia. I was playing with baby niece Maxine and baby niece Samantha got jealous. Even while holding Maxine, I had to take a free fall jump, but she was OK. The dream became a nightmare as I realized I might have forgotten my camera. End of dreams.
We Circumcised Boys > You uncircumcised girly men

Still in a race to revisit past chicks in the database from this past year before the year is over, I busted a #3 to the orange-haired chick whom I nearly mistook as a mannequin at True Religion Brand Jeans, some chick named Angelica from Jolee's class last Friday, Jessica who used to work at American Basics, and lastly Faith who used to work at Brookstone. That should do it. And now "self-celibacy" as I will not have any chance to bust a #3 while staying in the Philippines, for which I leave for tomorrow, due to no privacy in the full house.

I went to the Sport Chalet in Foothill to search for Vibram Five Fingers. Alas, they didn't have the design I wanted in my size. In fact, the employee helping me, whose name tag read, "Nick F," called the nearest stores and they were all unavailable as well. Random note: The employee mentioned he had winter classes at GCC that were cancelled. I remember when that happened to me years ago. I guess GCC never improved.

I was supposed to check out the Capoeira class of the one code-named "Choir Boy," but somebody got major fucked up in a car accident that caused so much traffic that by the time I was back in my stomping grounds, it was more practical to pull over and chill at the mall.

I caught up with Andy at the Hickory Farms kiosk. He asked for my contact info to give me a buzz when I get back from the Philippines.

I got my mommy a pink Sesame Street's Animal one-piece pajama from Spencer's.

I walked into Hot Topic. Some new dude, most likely a seasonal employee, mistook me as having bought my Gryffindor tie from that store when in reality I got it from Whimsic Alley. Nevertheless, he thought I looked familiar. This one chick who's been working there for a while, though I never got her name because I don't find her jackoffable, remarked to him that I'm supposedly there everyday. She must be in cahoots with my stalker.

I traveled west. I parked at the hookah lounge and then across the street cut through the mall as a shortcut to Hooters on the other side to meet up with Mark, Erick, and Erick's friend for all-you-can-eat wings. I had the garlic parmesan wings. Thank God I had cash because afterwards the waitress, as if she had never handled machinery before, took forever to process everyone else's credit cards to the point where they may have rescinded the tip.

Mark gave me a Christmas present. Randomly, Mark mentioned that lately he's been into Brie Olson videos whereas I name dropped Bailey O'Dare. Erick laughed as he had actually seen an O'Dare video.

Cutting through the mall again, I passed by this laser teeth whitening kiosk where the older lady working there was able to tag me as an actor/model.

OLDER LADY: Good. Now that's part of my sales pitch because you have to do it because you act and model.

By happenstance, Candice from Hot Topic and I were crossing the street at the same time. I started with, "Hi," and then let the power of my Gryffindor tie and sweater vest take over ...

RYAN: I'm about to leave town for the holidays for a month.
CANDICE: Where you going?
RYAN: Philippines. Looking forward to get out of this cold. You can walk around in a rainstorm over there and not get sick.
CANDICE: Yeah, everyone's sick around this time, like, "Get away from me!"

Blah, blah, blah ...

CANDICE: Enjoy your trip.
RYAN: Thanks.

She walked into somewhere - I think Coffee Bean. Then I drove down Magnolia Boulevard to visit the one code-named "Choir Boy."

"Choir Boy" just got the movie Colombiana on DVD. He needed help finishing the food in his fridge. He made omelets, though completely forgot he was cooking them when he got distracted as we bragged about how we circumcised boys were superior to any other males. Oh, and the booze - juice & vodka and sangria - was good as well.

Vahik called me his "son"

I'm still in a race to revisit past chicks in the database from this past year before the year is over. I kept it simple this time. I busted a #3 to Kristen and the talkative chick from yesterday.

At the Americana, Joseph mistook my Gryffindor tie for a USC tie.

JOSEPH: You play [Basket]ball?
RYAN: Um ... I'll watch, but ... I can't really shoot the ball ...
JOSEPH: [Laughs.] I'm the same way.
RYAN: ... And I can't really dribble and walk at the same time.

I visited Vahik. I got to see what the office's humor was like when no classes were in session.

Sam was working at the Hickory Farms kiosk. I guess he was wrong about last night being his last shift. He must've been irritable. He informed me that Andy's working tomorrow from 3:30PM-11:30PM. He told me, "Stay up," in that last decade "gangsta" sort of way.

Tonight's episode of WWE RAW had me - as the internet nerds like to say - "marking out hard" as the main event saw the team of WWE Champion CM Punk, United States Champion Zack Ryder, and World Heavyweight Champion Bryan "Daniel Bryan" Danielson entering through the Philadelphia crowd instead of traditionally using the entrance ramp.

At the gym late at night, I said my see-you-later's to Danny, who was working at the front desk, as this was probably my last workout before leaving for the holidays. The treadmill says I burned 694 calories at 5.73 miles. Sweet.

The guy who "stole" Christmas

I stopped by Church briefly before performing at the Christmas party at the place where I practice guitar. I was in semi-Gryffindor gear with the tie and sweater vest. As soon as I got there, they dropped the bomb on me that I have to cover Pipeline for someone who no-showed. As if that wasn't already a bad omen, Vahik required further changes. Further "Oh Shit" moment: I had to play an electric guitar for the first time! I lost track of what order, but I also played House of the Rising Sun, something that Vahik wrote, and Perfedia. I'm just glad I was able to switch to my regular guitar midway.

Basically, in terms of highlights, the random cougar, Kristen, whom I let into the database at the recital last year as affirmative action for not having enough cougars then was in the audience again. (See entry 12/19/10.) There was this animated chick who showed up later, claiming she's only called when they need labor. She was a natural blond who had this weird thing going on with her hair where it almost looked like a blended bowl cut, but it was actually shoulder length.

CHICK: So do you freestyle?
RYAN: Oh, um, not well.
CHICK: On guitar?
RYAN: Ooh! I thought you meant freestyle rap. Oh yeah, I can on guitar.
CHICK: It's the same thing, but our instruments are our voices. I think you do. You just don't know it yet.

She got out off singing duties. But later she was playing with two kids and tried to freestyle rap with them. On the microphone. Terrible! It was already bad enough that the little boy butchered that song for his vocal performance that goes, ♫ We fell in love in a hopeless place. ♪ They then butchered Beat Boxing itself! And I think she was trying to battle one of them in doing bridges.

She was flirty, but I spoke to her the whole time with cookies in my mouth in a "I'm too cool to be self-conscious" sort of way. Anyway, she wasn't ugly and is in my database to reward her persistence.

Traveling west, I carried my guitar with me - as kids these days say, like a boss - at the mall there. In its Hot Topic, this cute chick - who might've been Kristina, whom I met last 11/10/11, but unconfirmed because I can't remember exactly what she looks like after a month from first meeting - said she loved my tie.

RYAN: I'm assuming you're a Harry Potter fan.
UNCONFIRMED KRISTINA: Yes! I love Harry Potter!

UNCONFIRMED KRISTINA: Do you need help finding anything?
RYAN: I was looking for pink pajamas, but you don't have any. It's for my mommy.
UNCONFIRMED KRISTINA: You can try Victoria's Secret?
RYAN: I really don't feel like walking in there.

I made a new friend in a random familiar face from the PWG shows.

I was walking around the Hickory Farms kiosk when this older lady employee named Judy (not to be confused with my lesbian friend, Judy) noticed my guitar.

JUDY: You play guitar?
RYAN: No, I just like carrying it around to look cool ... Just kidding. I play guitar.

Holding the tray of free samples, she then explained how she feels the need to feed starving musicians. She continued to mechanically hand me free samples as she talked about how her husband likes Metal, yet plays classical. Then she mentioned to search for something called "Satriani Vai Malmsteen" on the internet.

Mommy and I ate dinner at Outback Steakhouse. None of the people there who are usually in the database were working. But there was this one brunette-with-blond-streaks waitress who had her hair tied back in a way that it vaguely reminded me of the lead singer for Shiny Toy Guns in the music video for You Are The One.

Back in my stomping grounds, at the mall I finally spoke to the Adele look-alike under the guise of inquiring about this waterproof case for cell phones and iPods. You know what? She looked better from a couple of feet away. She also sounds like Arnold Schwarzeneggar, but as a girl.

Sam at Hickory Farms looked so depressingly bored that I went out of my way to say, "What's up?" At least he was excited about it being his last day.

At Barnes & Noble, the security guard was laughing hysterically when I told him about the debacle of the performance earlier. He said that the audience would probably label me as the "guy who 'stole' Christmas" due to butchering the songs.

Anyway, that ethnically ambiguous Monica was working behind the cash register. I haven't seen her in a while. I'm reminded that she's a brunette now. Her hair is beginning to overcome that phase of being shapeless when down, looking normal only when it's tied back, yet barely long enough to tie. It's starting to look somewhat normal now as she wore it down. She's renewed in the database.

1 Ryan to 8 Australians

I traveled west and stopped by the mall in that city. From there, maps.google.com epicly failed in navigating me to Top Rocking class, but I got there only ten minutes late. Minor setback: I accidentally shuffled twice when I was supposed to only shuffle once and exclaimed, "Oh, whoops!" to everyone's comic relief. Highlight: Eric blanked out once and had to follow me to regain rhythm! Me!

In the coffee room, there were eight chicks whose accents I think were Australian. I think. I'm getting better nowadays in differentiating between Celtic, South African and Australian accents. One of them asked how is "massacre" spelled. Another answered, "M-A-double-S-A-C-R-E." Teehee. She said, "double-S" instead of, "S-S." Later when I was walking around, I saw that they were in the beginners' Salsa class. Ha! And Jojo claimed when I first met her that if I took the beginners' Salsa instead of skipping to the intermediate I would be stuck with old people wanting to learn how to dance for weddings.

Afterward, I stopped by the place of the one who insists to be code-named "Choir Boy" to review FMA drills of vertical gunting (scissors) and hubad lubad.

Back at the mall in my stomping grounds, the chick who was more jackoffable as a blond before dying her hair dark brown was working at Waba Grill Teriyaki House. Dana was working at Lush. I walked by as she had both hands on top of her head, a form which is usually seen when one is gyrating on the dance floor. Although in real life she was probably just fixing her hair. Still, provocative. Double score in the database!

I traveled west again to some bar called Viva Cantina. Or I guess it was more of a restaurant with a bar in it since there were kids who looked like they were definitely under the age of twenty-one there, mosh-pitting while everyone who was of drinking age looked at them weird. I had promised Nate two days ago that I would check out his band. (See entry 12/15/11.) On the way there, I had made a wrong turn and came upon a group of high school, yet legal (I think), chicks at a crosswalk who needed a ride. Too bad I was in a hurry. I would've banged them in my car.

I have to say that Nate's band has some cute groupies. There was this one youngin' who reminded me of this chick named Maggie that I hooked up with in Las Vegas one time. But there was this chick, a blondish brunette with a short ponytail, who was bold enough to go into the cockfest of a mosh-pit for a couple of seconds, basically a timid hit-and-run. She's in my database out of respect.

Comically, Nate said he hated his job at Hot Topic. It turns out that the last time I saw him two days ago was his last day. Why? Because he's going to the Philippines for two years to do Humanitarian work! He'll be starting out in Baguio City.

RYAN: When do you leave?
NATE: Wednesday.
RYAN: I leave Wednesday!

What a coincidence! Anyway, mommy forgot dinner, so I drove down the cross street and brought it to her at her work.

I visited the teacher, Dave, in my unofficial tour of visits before leaving for vacation next week. He played a Jackie Chan movie called Little Big Soldier.

In my race to revisit past chicks in the database from this past year before the years is over, I busted a #3 to Amanda again, finishing whatever positions I couldn't get to last night, moved on to an old friend Arlene, then Dana who works at Lush, and finally finished to the Adele look-alike who works at the i Play & Talk kiosk.

In Case of Asteroid

I bought a Tommy's chili cheese burger for the first time in twenty two months. The only other time that I've been there was seven months ago to buy a chili cheese hot dog. (See entry 5/15/10.)

At guitar practice, I received the songs that I would be playing at the Christmas party this Sunday.

At the mall, the Adele look-alike was working at the i Play & Talk kiosk. She's renewed in the database. At the Americana, the orange-haired chick whom I nearly mistook as a mannequin was working at True Religion Brand Jeans. Her hair was tied back for a change. That's a new detail for the database.

Jolee found a new spot to teach. I parked about a block away, walking down the street to look for it.

JOLEE: It's low key.

Good news: The floor work we did was the best choreography that I've ever participated in. Bad news: I popped my knee doing it.

When mentioning my upcoming holiday plans in the Philippines, Jolee remarked that I don't look Filipino.

RYAN: Yeah, I like to use that to my advantage to blend in like a chameleon. What about you?
JOLEE: I'm half Chinese.

Holy shit. Now he definitely knows how to camouflage certain genetics. I don't see any Chinese in him at all.

"What can I start you with? Freckled Lemonade?" "Yes ... How did you remember?" "'Cause I think I gave you like 6 refills last time ... Plus 1 to-go."

I traveled west (it sounds so epic when I put it in those words) and passed by the Hot Topic there. This dude named Nate remembered me and invited me to watch his "nerd punk" band on Saturday. (See entry 11/10/11.) Candice was working as well.

That chick, Amanda, from yesterday was working at Sport Chalet.

Ah, the database. Never gets old.

I returned to my stomping grounds to eat at Red Robin. The hostess, a short blond chick with all of her hair tied back, was leading me to the other side of the place when we passed by Evaine, who intervened, "Hey! Sit at my station!"

EVAINE: What can I start you off with? Freckled Lemonade?
RYAN: Yes ... How did you remember?
EVAINE: 'Cause I think I gave you like six refills last time ... Plus one to-go.

Well, el oh el. (Author's note: That one would make a great Facebook status later.)

Dennis was working as well. It was the same conversation as last time where I knock that Lockin' instructor for traumatizing me with his intermediate instruction. Dennis had actually taken his beginner's class before and he says even that was difficult. But Dennis vowed that this upcoming year was the year that he makes his return to dancing.

On the way to helping mommy at the laundromat, I bought her a Big Mac meal from McDonald's.

Toe socks, eh?

I had a dream last night that I was in some type of multi-storied building. I think I was in the basement. Uncle Lando challenged me to stop ten of his takedown attempts. Every time he shot in, I stuffed it. He gave up after five. I guess it's my subconsciousness treating me to how in real life I can kick his ass. End of dream.

I finally got to bust a #3 to that beautifully smiling waitress from Cheesecake Factory last Sunday. (See entry 12/11/11.)

I stopped by Jamba Juice for $1 oatmeal Wednesdays. I tried toppings of blueberry and black cherry, which I can't remember if I've tried already. The cashier was an aight looking chick named Jenn. Christy, whom I met last week, came out from the back and remarked, "Hey. Wednesday. You made it." Apparently, security guard Joseph was watching me through the window as I scraped up the remaining off the inside of the container with my spoon ...

JOSEPH: (Sneaking up on me) It's all gone!

The orange-haired chick whom I nearly mistook as a mannequin was working at True Religion Brand Jeans. She's renewed in the database.

I was passing by Red Robin when Evaine (whose name I mispell on purpose because it's unique and I don't want anymore unique-named people finding my journal - or horcrux), my server last time, told me to come in some time after 5:00PM for the next few nights. She seems nice. As sleazy as it may be, I think I will befriend her just to get to her old coworker Jazz (which was already the point of befriending Dennis and Branden, but this just reinforces it more). I later saw her with friends outside of Tilly's looking over the railing as if they were scouting for someone.

By happenstance, I saw Carissa from Hot Topic, in a cute beret, as an everyday person for a change carrying two huge shopping bags, going down the elevator - How cute. She takes the elevator instead of the escalators - and walking into the Disney store. How cute. She likes Disney.

I went to the mall in the next city to the west. I tried on some Vibram Five Fingers at Sports Chalet. The chick helping me out was a shoulder-length, blonde-haired chick whose name tag read: Amanda. In an OCD way, I noticed she parts her hair in the left. She's tall for a chick, but shorter than me like above average chicks should be. Interestingly, she also showed me something called toe socks. Alas, the style of Vibram Five Fingers that I was interested in was unavailable in my size. But for the sake of nothing going to waste, she's in my database.

Back in my stomping grounds, the Adele look-alike was working at the i Play & Talk kiosk. She's renewed in the database. Then I was at Spencer's. There was this blond chick, hair tucked behind her ears, wearing diamond earings, an orange and navy blue striped blouse, dark jeans, and high-heeled boots that brought her almost to my height. Out of boredom, I reached down for some victory yoinks while staring at her just because I can.

I did half an hour of cardio at the gym.

Kunai throwing = (in a Mortal Kombat's Scorpion tone of voice) "Get over here!"

Men in Black 3 has a trailer up.

I caught up with Andy at that Hickory Farms kiosk. Security tried to hassle him about keeping the kiosk's trash cans concealed within, but he's not allowed to keep trash with food stock due to health codes. He's in a tough spot.

Dana was working at Lush. At one point she wore this headband of stuffed antlers. Cute.

I came home to watch a new episode of Glee and caught a little of the WWE's special Tribute to the Troops afterward, but then returned to the mall when Mommy wanted to have dinner at In-N-Out burger.