Mom took my car to the shop for an oil change and check-up. Of course those dirty mechanics would always try to find something wrong to repair and make more money. Here's what I imagine goes on:
Mexican mechanic: Oh, well, you need a new Flux Capacitor. You have a blown Transformer. You also need to change your speakers for your Night Rider.
Mom: Oh, ok. How much will all that be?
Later ...
Mom: I don't think we can eat at restaurants for the next month.
Goddammit.
I visited Brian at the GNC and we discussed Danny McBride (of The Foot Fist Way fame) doing his ecstasy dance, made fun of that loiterer Manuel always quitting weights when he starts to feel the burn, the disappointing ending to Breaking Dawn (the final Twilight book), how I'm now only a Twilight fan because Kelly Clarkson (my future baby's mama) is, the upcoming Bruno movie, and most importantly this weekend's Electric Daisy Carnival.
While Brian was in the back, I pretended to be in charge of the store and even winged it with a few customers. I was practicing my Danny McBride ecstasy dance when this waitress named Eve, formerly of Zono Sushi in Glendale who had recognized my mom and I as regulars, bursted in after stopping her car in front.
Ryan (Me): How'd you find me?
Eve: I just saw you. I work in the Zono Sushi in Burbank now. Tell your mom.
I told my mommy. Speaking of my ultra Christain (despite Catholic) Prop-8-supporting mommy, she has apparently been trying to brag that I'm scared of gay people, an attempt at having people see me as as molded in her personal views. For example, in real life, I declined University of California Santa Cruz (UCSC) in favor of CSUN because the latter was ranked as #1 for Film that year. But according to my mommy, I declined UCSC because I was "scared of some gay court there."
Bollocks! I love lesbians.
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