Wednesday, August 24, 2011

♫ Yeah you ♪ shook me all night long ♬

The new fitness manager at the gym has been offering free consultations. His name's Jacob. I had an appointment with him at 2:30PM. It was Jacob meeting "Jacob" (my nickname that originates from Twilight).

JACOB: What's your goal?
RYAN: This might sound vague, but ... I wanna get to where those werewolf kids on Twilight are at.
JACOB: That's actually really specific.

My current Body Mass Index (BMI) is 24.5 and I'm at 14.5% body fat. Jacob said I'll need to get down to 10% body fat, change my workout to three sets of twenty reps of lightweights, add a couple of days of cardio per week, add more vegetables to my diet, and take BCAA and thermogenic supplements. Other than that, I'm doing everything correctly.

I was doing rows for my lat muscles in front of a chick doing sit-ups. She was light skinned with long, reddish hair tied back. Each pull gave the illusion of my hips thrusting forward. Each pull/hip thrust then became synced with her coming up for a sit up. Therefore, it was an illusion of her throbbing as I thrusted into her ... while the sound system blasted AC/DC's Shook Me All Night Long. I actually didn't want to take any breaks, resulting in one long superset. Best. Workout. Ever. She's in my database.

At the mall, Faith was working at Brookstone. Now I've made fun of her hair before, but ... Good God, what was she thinking today? She was basically going for the Bellatrix Lestrange look from Harry Potter! And her makeup didn't blend well with her face. Umm ... I mean, I guess I'd still hit it. I guess.

I took a break from reading more of American Gods at Barnes & Noble to eat dinner with my mommy at Thai BBQ.

No comments:

Post a Comment