The fluffer, the intermission and the main event

I had a few weird dreams last night. 1) I was at my mommy's sister's house. Dad was there. A knifer tried to pull a knife on me. I called 911, waited for almost an hour, and two cops looking like Cheech and Chong finally arrived. 2) I was in the military, despite keeping my hair. The battlefield looked like the playground of my elementary school. Someone else on my platoon and I were captured. But we escaped. 3) I was in Gotham City, but ironically writing the screenplay for a new Batman movie. End of dreams.

I woke up to rain.

At guitar practice, I'm finally on the fifth page of this eight-page, becoming-a-pain-in-the-ass Paco de Pena song.

And then I did my routine of carrying my guitar with me like a chick magnet around the mall. As soon as I arrived at the top of the escalators, across the floor to my left was the manager at Hot Topic on her way to work. She's renewed in my database.

The Adelle look-alike was working at the i Play & Talk vendor booth. She took a curling iron to her hair today. Considering she's on the thick side, I admire her ability to squat for a length of time, albeit looking for something on a bottom drawer as opposed to exercise. But she also has a good bend. Those details are in my database.

After chillin' at home, I had to return to the mall to pick up my new contacts and eat dinner at Red Robin. Why? Because I registered for their Rewards card fourteen days ago and it was the last day I can claim my complimentary appetizer. Since it was free, I got the most expensive one on the menu - Game Day nachos. But when I saw the addendum to the menu with nutritional facts, I almost exclaimed out loud, "What the fuck [was I thinking]?"

The Waitress' name was Evaine - or maybe it's spelled with a "Y" instead of an "E," but oh well. She's most likely Filipina. She tried to be flirty with me, for example, jokingly saying my name aloud when swiping my Rewards card, but I no longer check out Filipina chicks due to being overexposed to them throughout childhood. I was just a pain in the ass right back, for example ...

EVAINE: I don't mean to rush you with the check, but I need to clock out.
RYAN: I guess I'll eat slower. {Moves in slow motion.]
EVAINE: [Jaw drops; begging.] Please!

At least she stuck around, even after she clocked out, until I finished. Anyway, the hostess is this blond chick named April. She's at best waiting list status for the database ... with beer goggles preferable, but not necessary. Her eyes were brown, so not the cliche blond/blue eyes combo. Her hair was in a braid and the bangs looked like she at least got someone to cut them for her, though not at the best salon. Yeah, I'm starting to get desperate filling the void left by Jazz. Reminder: Capitalize on the reason why I befriended Dennis and Branden in the first place - to use them to get to Jazz.

Speaking of which, Dennis brought my food to me. It was the Oktoberfest burger again. He once took the Lockin' class, the same one where I left traumatized. (See entry 9/10/11.) At least he was smart enough to take the intro class on Mondays ... and he still had a hard time! I noticed that hostess, April, was eavesdropping on our conversation to laugh along with us. Score!

I passed by the manager at Hot Topic again as she laughed and spoke with a friend outside of the store. She then started heading back to her work and I noticed her shirt's neckline was wide enough that I could see her bra straps. I had a boner. I guess it was a sign of who to choose tonight in the database.

I got home and fired up the porn. You know the drill. If life was a porn video, that hostess, April, from earlier would be the fluffer, that Adelle look-alike from the i Play & Talk vendor booth would be intermission, and the manager at Hot Topic would be the main event.