Parading the Manny Pacquiao shirt at the mall ... and cockblocked by the escalators!

I wore my Pacquiao shirt to the mall simply to walk around flexing my pectoral muscles underneath. Some older white guy with a wife and daughter did a double take, kept walking, then finally turned back to ask me, "Did he win last night?" Yup!

And then I was actually cockblocked by the escalators. My absentminded ass got on to go down and on the parallel escalator to go up ... was Jazz! I didn't see her until literally the midpoint when we might've locked eyes! In a perfect world, I would've seen her get on before I stepped on, waited for her to get to the top, finally had the chance to talk to her when she's not busy, maybe borrowed Morgan's suggested line ("Hey, you don't know it, but we've been going out for a while now"), and she would've been so flattered that she would've had me walk her to her car and bow chicka wow wow ...

But nooo! In the real world, a little absentmindedness can cost you! And the escalators pulled us apart ... literally.

Then went to Hot Topic. The only dude who works there (lucky bastard) saw my shirt and went on about how he wishes he could've watched the fight, but had to work. And then the annoying chick had to interrogate me as always ...

ANNOYING CHICK: You're always here!
RYAN: What are you talking about? (I actually haven't been there in days.)
ANNOYING CHICK: I see you walking by!
(I can't believe she actually pays attention to me walking outside.)

Mommy and I ate at Outback Steakhouse. Our waitress' name was Lindsay (or "Lindsay L" as the receipt would say). She was an older white chick, brown hair with bangs and a short ponytail, and an accent that might've been midwestern. She was so nice. I even had to accept her suggestion of some apple pie-like desert. Mental note: I tried mango + cherry syrup iced tea and it was "meh." But pomegranate + huckleberry syrup tea was bomb!

Anyway, I remember watching Lindsay kneel down to wipe something. Her kneeling position, along with the audio of her midwestern accent, is now in my database.

LINDSAY: Hope to see you two again. Ask for Lindsay.

Will do.